Wednesday, September 10, 2003

A Press Release I'd Like to See


You've read about flashmobs in the newspaper. Now, tap the power of flashmobs for your enterprise, realizing ROI on your enterprise software investment, and increasing the stickiness of your customers.

Using our proprietary peer-to-peer, adaptive, autonomic, social-network-aware FLASHPOWER software, direct your employees, customers, and stakeholders to arrive at specific locations. We support over four thousand possible locations through our FLASH LOCATIONS PARTNERS program, including Starbucks(tm), Marriott(tm), and Newbury Comics(tm). FLASHPOWER supports twenty-five different activities for your mobs, including muttering, chanting, clapping, hopping on one foot, and furiously scowling while entering data into their PDA*. Upgrade to FLASHPOWER PRO and receive additional PRO locations, including such important sites as Faneuil Hall, Boston, the QuickStop used in Kevin Smith's film "Clerks," and the 1st base bleachers of Coors' Field**.

Flashmobs are critical elements of the connected enterprise strategy. Use them to mock competitors, sow confusion, distract the media from your most egregious foreign policy mistakes, or destroy the work of mad scientists who dare to play God. Don't let your competitors open up a flashmob gap. It's a first-mover's advantage, with increasing returns on the network effects, and only the most agile and connected enterprises will survive. "Keep the mob on your side."

* Available 1Q 2004.
** Admission not included.
FLASHPOWER, FLASHPOWER PRO, and "Keep the mob on your side" are trademarks of THE AMAZING FLASH. All other trademarks belong to their respective holders. This offer void in the universe.